I've been thinking a lot lately about what matters to me in life. Or more specifically, why my priorities are so often so badly skewed from what they should be. The short answer is this: apathy and distraction are easy; discipline is hard. And who wants to do what's hard? Not me; I know that much.
But no matter how hard I try not to care about the problems that I know exist in the way I live my life, I can't avoid momentary twinges of conviction, moments when the scripture reading for the week or the Bible study lesson or the sermon on Sunday morning seem to be speaking directly to my own messed up priorities. Unfortunately, these momentary twinges of conviction are just that - momentary. And then they're gone and I'm back to living my life the way I want to, rather than the way I should.
So here's the real question: how do you turn your life around when most of the time you don't even want to?
I wish I had a better answer, but here's what I've got right now:
Teach me your way, O Lord,
that I may walk in your truth;
unite my heart to fear your name.
Turn my eyes from looking at worthless things;
and give me life in your ways.
- Psalm 86:11, 119:37
